are you too busy? part II

via NYT.

A while ago, I wrote about how people think they are too busy. Today, my friend sent me this great article from the NY Times that does a great job of talking about the issue in more depth.

Two of my favorite passages:

"They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or anxiety, because they’re addicted to busyness and dread what they might have to face in its absence."

"(She once ruefully summarized dating in New York: “Everyone’s too busy and everyone thinks they can do better.”) What she had mistakenly assumed was her personality — driven, cranky, anxious and sad — turned out to be a deformative effect of her environment."

I am fortunate because I know some really happy people and some really unhappy people and these people transcend all spheres of life. Some live in cities, some live in the suburbs, some are single and some are in relationships. These people teach me how to be happy and unhappy. I think its easy to say that happiness is a choice that we make each day. While I believe that is true, the choice is not just to be happy. The choice is to decide what our priorities are and to live a life that honors that or to do the things that will make us happy. When we are sincere to ourselves and those around us, then our life can expand infinitely. We must be brave to be happy.

Nietzshe wore, "The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." 

I think our lives are so busy because we have bought into this idea that happiness comes from traditional notions of success. Having a certain job, having a certain relationship, having a certain home or car. And all these things come with the pressure of a time stamp. Have a degree(s), get a prestigious scholarship, earn a high paying job, own an extravagant home, have a blissful marriage, maybe a baby on the way and all before you are 30! Because when you turn 30, its all over.

The business problem bothers me so much because it is married to all these other archaic notions and ideologies of happiness and success that my peer group has so blindly accepted without questioning whether these things are right from them.